Saturday, December 29, 2007

The Alpha & Omega Part Two--The Real Jesus

Somewhere along the way an artist really screwed things up for Christians. An artist commissioned to paint a portrait of Jesus confused a person from Nazareth with a Nazarite vow and gave Jesus long hair (not true). He (or she) then inexplicably gave Jesus blue eyes and fair skin because obviously the artist had never actually seen a person from Palestine. Thus, a tradition was born that taught Christians that their king, teacher, priest and savior looked like the lead singer of an '80's hair metal band. No wonder most Christians are wimps. They seek to model their behavior after a Jesus that they believe looked like Jon Bon Jovi circa 1987.

A few years ago a group of forensic archaeologists used 1st century Palestinian skeletal remains to reconstruct what a typical Jewish man in the time of Jesus looked like...hence, the bubba on the left. Yes, Jesus looked more like this than Axl Rose. Jesus looked like a guy who changes your oil, hunts deer, watches NASCAR and could actually take another dude in a fight. Indeed, Jesus grew up in a hick town and he worked a blue collar job for most of his life. The one who was, is and will come again was not a sweet wuss who wants to give everyone a hug but a man who will not blink twice before sending billions of unrepentant sinners to hell. Deal with it.